北欧国家向来在人类发展指数、性别平等、社会福利待遇等方面在世界范围内名列前茅。
但如果有“社恐指数”这回事,它们可能也会拔得头筹。
传闻说1987年以前,冰岛每个周四都没有电视可以看,因为政府希望人们多出去社交。
也是,寒天冻地的,谁愿意没事儿在外头溜达啊,得用政策工具把人们逼出去才行。
Thursdays in Iceland were traditionally a day to connect with family and friends. This may sound strange, but until 1987, there was no TV broadcast in Iceland on a Thursday.
冰岛的星期四传统上来说是与家人和朋友联络感情的日子。听起来可能有点奇怪,但1987年之前,冰岛都没有周四的电视转播。
It’s believed that this came from a desire not to have a nation filled with TV-addicted zombies. As a result, many Icelanders born before 1987 joke that they were most likely conceived on a Thursday.
人们认为这是因为这个国家不能全都变成沉迷电视的僵尸。因此,许多1987年以前出生的冰岛人都开玩笑说,他们很有可能是在星期四被怀上的。
还有一种说法是,不止周四,过去有段时间中整个7月份都是没有电视可以看的。
If you were to visit Iceland in 1966, you would have noticed that nothing was shown on the country’s only state-run television station on Thursdays. The idea behind the decision was to reserve Thursdays as a day for socializing.
如果你1966年去冰岛,就会注意到冰岛唯一的国营电视台在星期四不会播放任何节目。这个决定背后的想法是把星期四定为社交日。
The ban expanded to the month of July when it was decided that nothing would be shown on television during the whole month. As July was considered a vacation month, it was also expected for locals to spend their days outdoors. Luckily the Thursday ban ended in 1983 while the July ban lasted until 1987.
随后,禁令扩大到整个7月份,当时决定在整个7月内都不在电视上播放任何节目,因为7月被视为休假月,当地人也希望在户外度过这个月。幸运的是,周四的禁令在1983年结束,而7月份的禁令一直持续到1987年。
这些可能都只是人们的猜测。不过,北欧人民的社交距离的确一直是被调侃的对象。比方说,芬兰就常常被人称为“社恐福音”。
Certain things you do at one place are totally OK and understood. You do the same thing in another place and it does not come through at all or it might even be totally misunderstood.
某个地方的习俗在当地是完全没问题的,但一旦到了另一个地方,就行不通甚至会被完全误解。
1 排队隔老远
To start with an easy one: personal space. Finns respect the personal space of each other a lot. You might have seen this funny picture already about Finns waiting at the bus stop.
就拿个简单的说:私人空间。芬兰人非常尊重彼此的私人空间。你可能已经看过这张关于芬兰人在公共汽车站等车的照片了,真的很有趣。
2 对话别对视
People do not like to make eye contact with strangers and, even when talking to friends and family, constant eye contact is not very common. It might be a sign of rudeness in other cultures not to look each other in the eye when talking—in Finland it is simply just the opposite.
人们不喜欢与陌生人进行眼神交流,即使在与朋友和家人交谈时,持续的眼神交流也不常见。在其他文化中,交谈时不直视对方的眼睛可能是粗鲁的表现——在芬兰,情况恰恰相反。
If you are standing too close to someone while talking you will notice that the other person is trying to get a bit further from you. You should notice and respect it and leave as much personal space for the other person so that he or she can feel comfortable.
如果你说话时站得离某人太近,你会注意到对方会试图离你更远一点。你应该注意并尊重这一点,给对方留下尽可能多的私人空间,让他/她感到舒适。
3 动口别动手
Also, touching strangers while talking to them might feel awkward to the other person. In more southern cultures it is acceptable, for example, to tap someone`s shoulder or hold his arm for a second as a sign of sympathy.
另外,与陌生人交谈时碰到他们可能会让对方感到尴尬。在很多欧洲南部的文化中,轻拍对方的肩膀或握一下对方的手臂表示共情是可以接受的。
In Finland, for most people physical contact while talking even among friends is not so common. Finns do not give kisses on the cheek when greeting each other. Mostly the greeting is saying hi or shaking hands (even with women). People who know each other and are friends or family greet each other with a hug.
不过在芬兰,对大多数人来说,即使是朋友之间交谈,身体接触也不常见。芬兰人互相问候时不会亲吻脸颊。大多数的问候就是打打招呼或者握手(哪怕是问候女性)。互相之间认识的朋友或家人问候时会拥抱。
4 隐私别探问
People do not talk about their salaries or financial status and it is very uncommon (and sometimes even considered rude) to ask even friends about how much they earn. It is simply considered a part of their personal space. No one comments about each other’s appearance or clothes unless it is something positive or someone asks for an opinion.
芬兰人不会谈论他们的薪水或经济状况,甚至连朋友之间都很少见问对方挣多少钱。这是个人空间的一部分。也没有人评价对方的外表或者衣着,除非是积极的评论或者是对方在认真地征求意见。
In the same way, it is totally unacceptable to ask married friends or couples about if and when they want to have children and how many of them they want. The logic behind this is that people will tell things themselves anyways if they want to talk about them. A lot of unwritten social rules in the Finnish society represent the principle of “Live and Let Live”.
同样,询问已婚的朋友或情侣是否会要孩子、想什么时候生孩子、以及想生几个孩子是完全不可以接受的。这背后的逻辑是,如果人们真的想谈论这些事情的话,他们反正都会说的。芬兰社会有许多不成文的社会规矩,而且都代表着这样一个原则:各自安好,别管闲事。
5 心情自己知
Finns tend to keep to themselves and not discuss their personal life. Talking about feelings is seen as socially unacceptable. Only the very necessary is uttered. When Finns receive a gift, they will very briefly thank the gift-giver but are not expected to tell whether they like the gift or not.
芬兰人喜欢自己待着,也不太谈论他们的个人生活。在社交场合倾诉情绪被认为是不可接受的。一般只在非常必要的情况下才表露情绪。当芬兰人收到礼物时,他们会非常简短地感谢送礼人,但不会告诉他们自己是否喜欢这个礼物。
This type of behavior is often seen as sullen by Central Europeans and easily mistaken for unfriendliness. Finns rarely smile or laugh, and for this reason, they are often seen as hostile by more sophisticated folks.
这种行为常被中欧人认为对方是在生闷气,很容易被误认为不友好。而且芬兰人也很少微笑或大笑,因此,世故的人也经常觉得芬兰人有敌意。
另外,芬兰的性别平等状况也经常被拿来讨论。
There is a high degree of equality between the genders in Finland, as can be seen in the relatively high number of women holding advanced positions in politics and other areas of society.
芬兰的性别平等程度很高,在政治和社会其他领域担任高级职务的女性人数相对较多。
Chauvinistic or patronizing attitudes toward women are generally considered unacceptable, although such attitudes do persist in practice. Women are usually independent financially and may offer to pay their share of a restaurant bill, for instance. A man may politely refuse such an offer, but it is equally polite to accept it.
大男子主义或者性别傲慢通常是不可接受的,虽说这种事情在现实中也确实存在。女性通常经济独立,她们也愿意吃饭后AA。男性一般会礼貌地表示愿意请客,但跟女性AA同样也是礼貌和可接受的。
芬兰的这些特质经常被归结为气候因素的影响——道路结冰,人们不愿出门社交;空气太冷,讲话要短要快要精炼;极夜太长,要少加班,多福利,等等。
芬兰的邻居瑞典和挪威也或多或少分享了这些特点。
想一想,不需要无谓社交,也挺让人动心的。
Notes
sympathy /ˈsɪmpəθi/ n赞同;支持
utter /ˈʌtər/ v出声;说;讲
sullen /ˈsʌlən/ adj面有愠色的;闷闷不乐的
sophisticated /səˈfɪstɪkeɪtɪd/ adj见多识广的;老练的
chauvinistic /ʃəʊv(ɪ)ˈnɪstɪk/ adj沙文主义的(此处指认为某一性别优于另一性别的)
patronizing / ˈpeɪtrənaɪzɪŋ / adj自认为高人一等的
编辑:陈月华
来源:guide to iceland; the culture trip; word press; nordicrpg
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