《从心出发》，这回破冰演讲算是真的破了~

经历了上周在舞台上的挫败自我打击之后，今晚的演讲终于没有重蹈覆辙，虽然没有获得最佳演讲者，但是对自己的表现总体满意，我给自己打75+。

原因有三，第一我总结了上周的演讲为什么有些环节不流畅不自然的问题，刻意地去练习复读逐字稿，心得是自己写的稿子，读上十遍一定能够背下来，背到非常熟悉不容易忘记的程度。

第二我收到了Gary 老师在周末给我的修改反馈，严重怀疑他是新东方的英语语法老师，对于英语语言和语法语态尤其仔细认真，做他学生，真是要惊出一声冷汗，也好时刻提醒我不要随便把一篇稿子不经揣摩修改发给任何一个资深的头马。

第三，更进一步认识了今年的深圳峰会组织者之一Viola, 我知道很多朋友认识她很久了，但是我最近这半个月才从线上到线下认识她，真是一个十分谦虚又很贴心的点评反馈者。我打算继续和她相处，和比自己能量场强的人在一起，不知不觉也能上升几分高度，虽然不知道是在哪些方面，哈哈~

我的师傅Leo在演讲里说起只有在头马才能随心所欲地做自己。我一半同意他的观点，一半不甚同意。为什么不多让自己在演讲过程中真实释放的天性自我多一些带入到自己的生活中去呢？演讲与生活并不是分开而孤立的，开心的事情可以在头马中说，不开心的事情也可以在头马中说，当我们越来越多的在生活中做积极的自己，是不是可以逐渐地影响身边其他人，让生活变得更有情趣和快乐一些，从而越来越随心所欲呢？

师傅今天的演讲题目《我是谁》，有点没听懂，隐约感觉他有点泛起哲思的波澜，作为两个孩子的父亲，身兼数职的他的确需要呼吸些新鲜空气，享受独处带来的静谧空间。有时候身为培训师可能会传达一种只可意会不可言传的境界，而我喜欢大白话，就像今天师兄说在幽默演讲中观众之所以会笑，是因为观众感觉到自己的智商和情商要高于演讲者，在和演讲者的对比中找寻到了站在高处的优越感。我不纠结我是谁这个论题，我能定义我是什么样的人，可我却无法定义别人眼中的我。

有点扯远了，相对于上周的中文演讲稿，我把英文演讲稿从结构和故事情节上修改了一遍，不知道为什么还是喜欢做英文演讲多一些，这会让我更自信一点，就像Viola说的，也许台下没那么多人一眼看出你说英文演讲时的漏洞，我能够圆过去。附上我演讲的英文稿如下做个备忘。Viola 提到我的开头太平淡了，相对结尾不够吸引人。嗯，她的意见我照单全收，下一次演讲一定要在这个上面有所突破，稍稍有点遗憾的是没有留下单人演讲照片和视频，今后一定补上。

Start from new, Start from heart

Dear fellow toastmasters, my friends,

Good evening! I'm Samantha, thank you for listening tomy first ice breaker speech in Mandarin last Tuesday here. I used to be a memberof PRO toastmasters from mid of 2011~2015. During that time, took various rolesin my club, such as club Secretary, VPE and the fifth club president. I kept myToastmaster pin and club speech trophy at home as a good memory for myself.

But just two weeks ago, my elder daughter broke oneof my club trophies unintentionally when I was out for training. When Ireturned back home, I looked at the separated glass base of the trophy lying onthe table, I was very angry, but I tried to take a deep breath before I talkedto my girl.” Hey, Panda, tell me why you broke my trophy? How did you get it byyourself, I put it very high above the cabinet, It’s too dangerous! She wasvery clam and murmured “Mom, I like this trophy, so I moved the chair and stoodon that to get it. Sorry, I didn’t mean to do that, I want to have my trophytoo, can you buy it for me?” My anger was a little smoothed, I crouched down, touchedher head gently. “My honey, the trophy can’t be bought, you must to earn itby yourself through hard work.” She seemed to understand and nodded herhead, said “Yes I will try.”

After that, I put the broken trophy into the garbagebag, I saw my name and the awarded date on the trophy, how clear, 2013~2014, butit’s all gone... I was a little upset that moment, my mind begin to recall the memorieswhen I stood onto the stage and enjoyed giving speechesin front of a group of people, when I was writing the meeting summary withgreat passion in mid night like someone said I’m a beaver, when I was nervousbut exciting to compete with other contestants. But now, where am I? When did Ibegin to give up giving speeches? When did I follow the crowd, to restrain myselfand become someone that I don’t like just because I’m a mother of two kids?Gradually, there is an inner voice become stronger and stronger, it startedtalking to me “Hey Samantha, you have to start again!”

So, I decided to start again for my hobby. Luckily,after I came several times to join Artisan club meetings, I began to realizethere is not a conflict to balance my job, my life and my hobby together. I sawthere are many moms of two kids are here to embrace the challenges to makespeeches or workshops, and some of them are even older than me. My mentor Leois also a father of two kids, how inspiring!

I started to prepare the first speech draft when thetrophy was broken for one week. I sent it to my mentor for advice and name myspeech title as” Start Again.” waiting for his encouragement. However, Beyondmy expectation, He said seriously” your description in the middle part are notso obvious to show you pain and willingness to make a change. For you, you arenot freshman. Not just starting from new, but starting from heart! “Ifollowed his advice to revise my draft and made my own decision to deliver theicebreaker again today. The past belongs to the history, only thepresent belongs to me. Starting from new, it’s not so that difficult,startingfrom heart, I will keep on learning and trying, how about you?