What is love? Five theories on the greatest emotion of all

你眼中的爱是？没答案的话，听听他们的吧~

"What is love" was the most searched phrase on Google in 2012, according to the company. In an attempt to get to the bottom of the question once and for all, the Guardian has gathered writers from the fields of science, psychotherapy, literature, religion and philosophy to give their definition of the much-pondered word.

    内部统计，2012年，“什么是爱？”成为google上搜索率最高的一大难题。为了高效率并充分详尽满足大家的好学、求知欲，研究人员向科研、心理学、文学、宗教和哲学各个领域的专家、学者发出邀请，用笔触诠释这个让人捉摸不透的字。

Jim Al-Khalili

Biologically, love is a powerful neurological condition like hunger or thirst, only more permanent. We talk about love being blind or unconditional, in the sense that we have no control over it. But then, that is not so surprising since love is basically chemistry. While lust is a temporary passionate sexual desire involving the increased release of chemicals such as testosterone and oestrogen, in true love, or attachment and bonding, the brain can release a whole set of chemicals: pheromones, dopamine, norepinephrine, serotonin, oxytocin and vasopressin. However, from an evolutionary perspective, love can be viewed as a survival tool – a mechanism we have evolved to promote long-term relationships, mutual defence and parental support of children and to promote feelings of safety and security.

Jim Al-Khalili is a theoretical physicist and science writer

     物理学家Jim Al-Khalili：爱就是化学反应

    从生物学考虑，爱是一种类似饥饿、口渴的强有力的生理需求，但却较之更持久。我们常说，爱使人盲目、无条件地付出，是的，某种意义上来说，面对爱，我们毫无掌控之力。然而，既然我说了爱就是化学反应，那它的无法控制就不难理解了。短时的性欲渴求伴随着一系列如睾丸素、雌激素等化学物质的产生和释放，那么，在真爱或结合中，人脑就会控制身体释放十分全面的让人体更好结合的化学物质：信息素、多巴胺、降肾上腺素、血清素、催产素和加压素。然而，用发展的眼光看待问题，爱也可作为生存工具，人们运用这一原理，增进更加长远的情感关系、巩固婚姻、确保父母和睦的家庭氛围并联合保障安全。

    ---Jim Al-Khalili是物理科学理论研究作家。

Philippa Perry

Unlike us, the ancients did not lump all the various emotions that we label "love" under the one word. They had several variations, including:

Philia which they saw as a deep but usually non-sexual intimacy between close friends and family members or as a deep bond forged by soldiers as they fought alongside each other in battle. Ludus describes a more playful affection found in fooling around or flirting. Pragma is the mature love that develops over a long period of time between long-term couples and involves actively practising goodwill, commitment, compromise and understanding. Agape is a more generalised love, it's not about exclusivity but about love for all of humanity. Philautia is self love, which isn't as selfish as it sounds. As Aristotle discovered and as any psychotherapist will tell you, in order to care for others you need to be able to care about yourself. Last, and probably least even though it causes the most trouble, eros is about sexual passion and desire. Unless it morphs into philia and/or pragma, eros will burn itself out.

Love is all of the above. But is it possibly unrealistic to expect to experience all six types with only one person. This is why family and community are important.

Philippa Perry is a psychotherapist and author of Couch Fiction

     心理疗师Philippa Perry：爱有千姿百态。

    和当今人类不同，先人并没有向我们一样将各种繁杂的感情都归结于一个“爱”字上。他们分成很多种去表示，比如：

    philia（友情），在他们看来这是一份不掺杂性爱的真挚深刻的情感，存在于最亲密无间的亲友之间或者在战场上生死与共的、建立起不一般友谊的战士之间。ludus（游戏之爱）这是来描述泛爱滥交、鬼混调情的人们。pragma（编译指示）就是指成熟稳重的爱了，通常在长期稳定的夫妻关系之间，这时候的爱充满着积极有益的承诺、妥协、理解和默契。agape（神的爱）是更广泛的一种爱，没有专属性，是属于对人类的博爱。philautia是自爱，当然不是那种极为自私的爱，正如亚里士多德发现的或是一些心理治疗师告诉你的，在关心他人之前首先要学会爱护自己。最后也是最少的，但它的麻烦可不小，eros（性爱）是性欲所激发的，若非它发展成为友情或婚姻爱情，长久下去只会不及而终、自取灭亡。

    所有的爱都已概括在上文中，但是，要想和你所挑选的人将这六种爱体验个遍可能不现实。这就要靠家庭与社会在其中起重要的调节作用了。

    ---Philippa Perry既是心理治疗师，又是沙发小说的作家。

Julian Baggini

The answer remains elusive in part because love is not one thing. Love for parents, partners, children, country, neighbour, God and so on all have different qualities. Each has its variants – blind, one-sided, tragic, steadfast, fickle, reciprocated, misguided, unconditional. At its best, however, all love is a kind a passionate commitment that we nurture and develop, even though it usually arrives in our lives unbidden. That's why it is more than just a powerful feeling. Without the commitment, it is mere infatuation. Without the passion, it is mere dedication. Without nurturing, even the best can wither and die.

Julian Baggini is a philosopher and writer

    哲学家Julian Baggini：爱是充满热情的奉献。

    爱不是简简单单一件物什，这是它让人捉摸不透之处。家长的爱，伴侣的爱，孩童的爱，国家的爱，邻里的爱，上帝的爱等等，这些都有着不同的特点。同时又都有弊处：盲目的，单一的，不幸的，顽固的，易变的，相对的，误导的，无条件的。但是，往最好方面想，爱是一种热情的奉献，能让我们得到滋润和成长，尽管它经常是毫无征兆得到来的。这就是为什么爱不仅仅是一种强烈的感觉。若没有承诺，它就成了单一的迷恋了。若没有了激情，它就只剩下奉献了。若没有精心呵护，就算有再好的条件都只会导致花朵般爱情的枯萎与凋亡。

    ---Julian Baggini是哲学家也是作家。

Jojo Moyes

What love is depends on where you are in relation to it. Secure in it, it can feel as mundane and necessary as air – you exist within it, almost unnoticing. Deprived of it, it can feel like an obsession; all consuming, a physical pain. Love is the driver for all great stories: not just romantic love, but the love of parent for child, for family, for country. It is the point before consummation of it that fascinates: what separates you from love, the obstacles that stand in its way. It is usually at those points that love is everything.

Jojo Moyes is a two-time winner of the Romantic Novel of the Year award

     言情小说作家 Jojo Moyes：爱能谱写所有迷人的故事。

    爱是什么，取决于你处在爱的那一阶段。平平安安的爱让你体会到它的常见以及如同空气般的存在感，让你几乎要忽略它。缺少教育的爱，会让你茫然不知所措，耗时耗力还消耗你的精力。爱能谱写所有迷人的故事：这故事不仅仅指浪漫爱情，还有父母对子女无私的爱，家庭亲友间淳朴的爱还有对国家满腔热血的爱。这些故事在圆满结束前才尤为让人着迷的：让你被迫与爱人分离的困难，阻碍你爱之旅的挫折，都让你乐此不疲地战斗着。在这些故事中，爱便是其中唯一的主题。

    ---Jojo Moyes已两次获得浪漫小说奖。

Catherine Wybourne

Love is more easily experienced than defined. As a theological virtue, by which we love God above all things and our neighbours as ourselves for his sake, it seems remote until we encounter it enfleshed, so to say, in the life of another – in acts of kindness, generosity and self-sacrifice. Love's the one thing that can never hurt anyone, although it may cost dearly. The paradox of love is that it is supremely free yet attaches us with bonds stronger than death. It cannot be bought or sold; there is nothing it cannot face; love is life's greatest blessing.

    修女Catherine Wybourne：爱既是自由却又约束着我们。

    经历爱是比定义爱更简单的。爱是神赋予我们的美德，我们爱上帝胜过一切，爱我们的邻里就像他爱他自己一样。它看起来似乎是很遥远的，除非我们与它肉体接触，可以这么说，爱在生活中有着另种表达：和平友善、慷慨大度和无私奉献。爱是永远不会伤害到任何人的，尽管有时需要付出昂贵的代价。用一句自相矛盾的话来描述爱：它是无上自由地却又与我们紧密相连、休戚相关。爱，买不来，也卖不掉；爱可以战胜一切；爱也是对生命最美好的祝福。

    ---Catherine Wybourne是一名本笃会修女。